


Always another adventure waiting

by queerfanwrites



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, Unrequited Love, im sorry, yaz just wants to be close to the doctor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2019-05-07
Packaged: 2020-02-27 17:01:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18743269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queerfanwrites/pseuds/queerfanwrites
Summary: Yaz has a heart to heart with her mum about the Doctor. Angsty, unrequited feelings. You have been warned.I may come back and add a follow-up chapter at some point, I'm undecided.





	Always another adventure waiting

It had been a month since Yaz had stepped on board the TARDIS, since she had told the Doctor she wanted more of the universe, when really all she had wanted was more time with the eccentric woman who had torn into her life and stolen her heart so completely. A month of seeing wonders, running from danger, saving lives, and falling more and more in love. So, standing in front of the door to her flat, loaf of bread in hand and only half an hour passed since she had left, one could forgive her for forgetting the interrogation to come.

It was Graham who suggested a few days at home, of course. He wanted some rest from all the running, and to pay Grace a visit. Yaz and Ryan couldn’t deny that a break would do them all good. So the Doctor had taken them back to Sheffield, promising to meet them again in a week.

“I’m back. Got the bread.” Yaz announced as she entered the flat. She left the bread on the kitchen counter and immediately retreated to her room. She flopped down on her bed, sighing as she breathed in the comfort and security of her home. The Doctor’s manic energy was catching, but now that she wasn’t here, Yaz felt exhausted. A gentle knock on her bedroom door disturbed the peace before long, though.

“You alright?” Najia asked as she opened the door.

“Yeah, mum. Just tired,” Yaz replied.

“So.” Najia sat on the bed near Yaz’s feet.

Yaz turned to her mum, confused. “So, what?” she asked.

“The Doctor. Go on, you promised you’d explain.”

Yaz groaned, “Not now, mum, please.”

“A mother has the right to be wary of anyone who suddenly pops up out of nowhere and into her daughter’s life, especially if said daughter looks at her as if she hung the moon itself.”

“I do not!” Yaz protested, spluttering. “and anyway, she didn’t just pop up out of nowhere, I’ve known her for a while now.”

“How long?”

“Uh, a couple of months, I guess.”

“And how did you meet her?” Najia pressed.

Yaz hesitated. Najia always seemed to know when Yaz was lying, but she couldn’t tell her the truth, she’d think she’d gone nuts. “It’s a long story,” she finally said.

“Like I said to the Doctor before, I’ve got time. Now tell me.”

“Why are you so interested, anyway? I’m an adult, I’m allowed to make my own decisions, you know.” Yaz tried to redirect the accusatory tone back at her mother.

“Because you’re obviously harbouring a crush on the woman. I’ve seen the way you look at her, the way you light up when she’s near you. Don’t deny it, please. I’m trying to look out for you, Yaz. She’s got to be nearly twice your age, anyway – I don’t think I’m comfortable with that.”

Yaz laughed at that. _A little more than twice my age, actually,_ she thought. “It’s none of your business, mum. And anyway, she would never like me back.” Yaz’s tone turned resigned, her eyes downcast.

Najia watched as Yaz withdrew into herself at the thought of her feelings going unrequited. “Oh, Yaz.” She whispered as she shuffled over and drew her daughter into her arms. “You remember what I said when you came out to me and your father?” She paused and pushed Yaz’s hair out of her face. Yaz looked up with glassy eyes, silent. “I said, you could bring home an alien and I wouldn’t care, as long as they are a person worthy of your love.” Najia smiled at the small laugh that erupted from Yaz.

“I remember.”

“So, is she someone worthy of your love?”

Yaz thought for a moment, before deciding to tell the truth. Or, at least, part of it. “She is. She’s incredible. She has such a good heart, I’ve seen it. She’s saved so many people’s lives and she’s shown me just how much beauty there is in the world. And she’s always there for me. Not just in an ‘I owe her my life’ way, but in so many other ways, she will always be there for me.”

Najia lifted her hand to Yaz’s cheek, to wipe away tears that were now falling thick and fast. Yaz allowed a sob to wrack her body and buried her head into her mother’s shoulder. “Oh, Yas,” she repeated. “It sounds to me like you need to have a serious talk with the Doctor. It won’t do to leave all these emotions hanging in the air.”

Another knock on her bedroom door startled Yaz out of her moment of self-pity.

“Sorry to interrupt. Yaz, the Doctor is-“ Yaz’s dad started

“Here! Yaz, I need your help, I-“ The Doctor interrupted as she pushed into the room, pulling up short when she saw Yaz’s tear-stained cheeks and Najia’s protective arms around her. “Yaz, are you okay? What happened?” she rushed over, only to be stopped by a hand from Najia.

“I’m fine, Doctor,” Yaz sniffled, trying to extract herself from her mum’s embrace. “Just a little worn out, you know.” She tried for a smile, although she guessed it came across rather strained. “What are you doing here?” She asked, trying to distract the Doctor.

“Oh, just a little disturbance of artron energy in the neighbourhood, nothing to worry about. Are you sure you’re okay? Because you don’t seem okay.”

“I think,” Najia interjected, “you two have some things to talk about.” She continued, with a pointed look to Yaz, as she got up and pulled her husband out of the room. A moment of awkward silence followed their exit.

“We have stuff to talk about?” The Doctor asked.

“It’s nothing.” Yaz insisted.

“Well, that’s obviously not true. Come on then, tell me.” Yaz fiddled with her sleeves, eyes downcast, looking anywhere but at the Doctor. Finally, the Doctor reached over and lifted Yaz’s chin, meeting her eyes at last. “Hey. You can tell me anything, you know that.” She said, softly.

Yaz took a deep breath and mustered up all her courage, her words coming quickly before she could rethink. “MymumthinksIshouldtellyouhowinlovewithyouIam.”

The Doctor paused in shock. The silence only allowed the anxiety to build up in Yaz, so she continued her ramble. “I mean, who wouldn’t be in love with you, you’re incredible. But I know you don’t like me in the same way and that’s okay, I never expected you to. I just had to tell you, I guess. I don’t want this to affect our friendship though! Oh, god I really hope you don’t hate me now. Please tell me you don’t hate me.” More silence. “Doctor, please say something.”

“Yasmin Khan. I… I don’t hate you.” Yaz slumped back in relief, but quickly sat back up again, knowing what would come next. The Doctor’s eyes were stormy and full of grief as she spoke, taking Yaz’s fidgeting hands to still them. “Quite the opposite, in fact. But… You must know, I can never be what you want me to be. I’m two thousand years old, Yaz. You’re only nineteen and you have your whole life ahead of you. You don’t want to waste that life on silly old me.” She chuckled dryly.

“But I do. It’s my life, Doctor. I can’t imagine spending it with anyone else.”

The Doctor sighed and squared her shoulders. This would be painful for both of them to hear. “I’ve made the mistake of falling in love with humans before. Incredible, brilliant, shining examples of the best of humanity, just like you. And I lost them. I watched as they were ripped from my life. They left me heartbroken, Yaz. I can’t go through that again. I can’t put you through that pain either, I would tear your world apart. I’m sorry.”

Yaz was silent. She hadn’t expected anything less, really, but having it all spelled out brought on a fresh wave of tears. She really was an idiot. Any hope of the Doctor ever returning her feelings had been washed away. Why did she even open her stupid mouth?

“Yaz?” The Doctor asked, tentatively. Yaz allowed herself two deep breaths, steadying herself and stomping down on the balloon of self-hatred and pity that threatened to burst over her. _One more deep breath. Dry your eyes._ Then she looked up to meet the Doctor’s eyes again.

“So, you said something about artron energy? Isn’t that the stuff you used to track that criminal in Alabama?” She asked, forcing a cheerful tone through the thickness still stuck in her throat. The Doctor smiled. _Oh, she pities me now,_ Yaz thought.

“Come on then, Yasmin Kahn, there’s always a mystery to be solved. Always another adventure waiting.” The Doctor announced, holding a hand out to pull Yaz up off the bed.

“Promise?” Yaz asked, her smile slowly becoming more believable. She didn’t need the Doctor to return her feelings, she realised. For now, she was content with just being close to her. Yaz wanted all the time in the world with this impossible woman who had fallen into her life.

“Promise.” The Doctor replied, her signature grin back in place.

It was a pretty good job that impossible woman owned a time machine, then.


End file.
